The Essence of Good Writing
Part Two- Understanding Your Relationships
Continued
Although this is a very polite memo, it’s also rather ineffective. The “boss” comes across as timid and quite unsure of his/her authority. He or she is in danger of not being taken very seriously. A more successful revision of this would be more direct, but still courteous:
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To:All Members of Staff
From:A Boss
Date:XXXXXX
Subject:Holiday Notification
Would all members of staff please remember to inform Susie, from HR, about their summer holiday schedules? Furthermore, before taking your leave, please make sure that you tell us well in advance (roughly a month ahead-of-time). This is because several people have given us rather short notice in the past, which makes it difficult to arrange adequate cover.
Thanks for your cooperation in this matter.
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Tone is a very difficult thing to master. It’s really “knowing your place”, which can be very difficult to judge or even accept. Everyone has their own attitude to authority, but one doesn’t have to be “creepy” or sycophantic, in order to write in the appropriate tone. You should look upon it as a social strategy, rather than any kind of attempt to categorize you and others around you. Whether you like it or not, there is hierarchy in the workplace, and it would be foolish for us to ignore this fact. Consider this email to a boss from a “cheeky” subordinate:
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Dear Boss,
How’s it going? Guess what? I didn't get round to doing that work you asked me to do last night. I was too busy with other stuff which you needn’t concern yourself with. Don't worry about it, though! Rest assured, I’ll do it sometime this week.
Look after yourself!
Cheeky
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This email is full of casual English, has a carefree style and is generally not respectful of the reader’s status. Many bosses would probably write a severe reprimand to the writer in question, and his/her job would be under review. A more appropriate way to write this would be:
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Dear Mrs. Boss
Sorry for the delay in sending you the report on XX. Unfortunately, I had to complete the end-of-year sales’ analysis, which took me all last night to do.
I could try to finish the report by the end of the day. To do it properly, however, I feel that I need all of this week. Would this be possible?
Thanks very much for your feedback in advance.
Best regards,
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Although this might not be the best news to your boss, it is conveyed in a tone that should hopefully help to support your request. After all, communication- in all its forms- is there to promote understanding of you and the situations you are in. The world you create around you is the one you speak and write. More than this, you can only gain respect and authority if you give it in return.
